Zerlina Maxwell and Sexual Violence: We Agree On One Aspect, Not on Another

I have great respect for Zerlina Maxwell and no desire to contradict her on what are thoughtful and well stated positions on the prevention of sexual violence. I support fully the central argument she makes:Stopping rape is an issue men must take up rather than women.She’s right, and that cannot be underscored enough (I've addressed the issue previously here). Women cannot “stop rape” by being better behaved, smarter, more intuitive, or even by being better self-protected (i.e., with a firearm). Colorado state senator Evie Hudak has absorbed  much criticism for challenging a witness at a legislative hearing on the efficacy of firearms in the protection of women.  But while Hudak’s remarks might have been perceived as inartful, they are not baseless. The vast majority of sexual assaults on women are perpetrated by men they know, and whom they’ve invited into their physical environments with their guards down; thus, in situations where a gun- no matter how proficient the owner- would make no difference. The gun lobby and its gun-worshipping echo chamber have of course demonized Hudak, Maxwell, and everyone else who dares to contradict the intoxicating, Hollywood scenario of street justice meted out by a gun-toting woman against some horrific offender. But the sad fact is that guns don’t prevent the kind of rape most often perpetrated on women, men or anyone else. It just doesn’t work that way (as an aside, it’s funny to me how conservatives blame Hollywood for everything but will stand beside the “Death Wish” narrative as a real prescription for addressing interpersonal violence).To be clear: I would never discourage any woman- a stranger or my little sister- from owning and training with a handgun for personal defense. Nor would I refrain from applauding heartily if her possession of the gun, willingness to use it, and skill and good fortune in its use resulted in the neutralization of someone who meant her harm. But I deal in reality and not macho fantasy. I know that a gun is a sword and not a shield; that simply owning one is several steps away from its utility as a protective measure. And I know that that reality almost never involves a Tarantino-esque bloodbath against the unjust and in favor of the righteous.My only disagreement with Ms. Maxwell’s prescription for a safer world is with her apparent belief that men (and more to the point boys) can be taught to be less sexually aggressive, i.e., “taught not to rape.” Research does not bear this out. In fact, most men are not sexually violent. Many if not most have learned objectifying and unhealthy attitudes toward women and sexuality, but most will recognize discomfort or terror, or a state of unconsciousness (or semi-consciousness) on the part of a potential victim and back off. Most men don’t need to be taught to refrain from sexual violence.Again, to be clear: This does not mean for a second that I don’t favor teaching boys as they grow into manhood more about decency, equality, and non-patriarchal gentleness toward women. It only means that, when it comes to the urge, desire or proclivity to commit felonies, the violators are generally not teachable, and the non-violators are not in need of that kind of instruction. A healthier societal attitude toward women will probably encourage more bystander intervention (which I do think is a good area to invest time and effort) and may generally make men think twice before objectifying in the first place. But that’s a distant dream in a media environment saturated with sex and objectification, and currently selling everything from toothpaste to tires.The most perplexing and frightening aspect of sexual violence is the mystery of its origins. Most who believe in an ordered universe assume that evil is not innate but inculcated, and thus preventable or at least reversible. Would that I could agree, but it’s not what recent and replicated research on the subject suggests. Similarly, supposed “equalizers” like handguns are floated as panaceas, but they are not the answer either- and they carry terrifying potential downsides.The answer, as Ms. Maxwell suggests, lies within the perpetrator. Unearthing it, sadly, is still an elusive proposition.